humor in the truth

We all know that man has long been fascinated by three things. Fire, being outdoors, and telling the woman to just stand back – because the man knows what he is doing.

Dave forwarded me an email the other day. Since he works in an office, he no doubt receives dozens of these humorous emails each week, and this is the one he chooses to forward to me. You may ask why.  I, of course, already know the answer – because this is pretty much exactly how it goes down at our house.

Enjoy.

BBQ RULES

We are about to enter the BBQ season.  Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity.  When a man volunteers to do the BBQ, the following chain of events is put into motion:

Routine…

1.  The woman buys the food.

2.  The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.

3.  The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man – who is lounging beside the grill – drink in hand.

4.  The woman remains outside the compulsory three-meter exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.

Here comes the important part:

5.  THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

More routine…

6.  The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.

7.  The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great.  He thanks her and asks if she will bring him another drink while he flips the meat.

Important again:

8.  THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL and hands it to the woman.

More routine…

9.  The woman prepares the plates, salad, vegetables, bread, beverages, utensils, napkins, and sauce, and brings them to the table.

10. After eating, the woman clears the table, does the dishes, and cleans the kitchen.

And most important of all:

11. Everyone PRAISES THE MAN AND THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

12.  The man then asks the woman how she enjoyed her “night off” and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there is just no pleasing woman.